The Crime Against Print

Unless you have been asleep for the past few months, you probably noticed the most vile, disgusting, and outrageous news regarding books in Amerikkka. No, we are NOT talking about the new Trump bibles (although that is disgusting enough) but rather the practice of many libraries in their handling of periodicals. Desperate to gain more floor square feet for “makerspaces” and cupcake bakeries, some libraries have decided to eschew even the most recent copy of any periodical they offer, directing those who whish to read Time or Newsweek to their online versions. In other words, the former repository of print has become nothing more than an internet subscription service so that those literacy-challenged patrons can peruse their periodical with the convenient, bite-sized snippets of text they are used to seeing on their Eye-phones. Once again, in spite of much wailing and gnashing of teeth by codex custodians regarding book censorship by right-wing fanatics, it remains true that the biggest threat to print in libraries remains the librarians themselves!

Poor Fellow My Country

The title of Xavier Herbert's lengthy Australian novel is totally appropriate for today's rant. Weighing in at a hefty 1,463 pages, Herbert's novel is one of the longest works in the English language, and certainly the most voluminous tome ever published in Australia. (Here at True Archives, we read the book about ten years ago and it almost seemed like ten years to finish it.) We bring up this literary heavywieght not only as a descriptive phrase for contemporary American culture, but also as a challenge to the youth in our country who so desperately need to excercise what little reading ability they have left.

In an April 16, 2023 article published by the New York Times, parents of children attending school throughout the United States are expressing their frustration at the fact that their kids cannot (or more likely will not) read. The demands of people showing up at school board meetings to decry this situation could possibly be the same ones that demand certain books be banned from the school library, but that is beside the point. (The irony of outlawing texts that a child cannot understand is not lost on us; surveys have shown about 1 in 3 children in the United States cannot read at a basic level of comprehension anyway.) Even more ironic are the demands of their parents to "fix" a problem of their own making.

How many of these illiterate urchins have grown up in a household where print is unknown? How many have actually seen their parents reading a newspaper, magazine, or book? How many have been read to by these parents as they graduated from the crib to the nursery? The answer is obvious. Without the example of parents reading for pleasure or information, why should anyone expect their children to value the book? Without courageous librarians who resist their Biblioposer colleagues in gutting the codex collection of countless accumulation caches, who can expect anything less than a generation of screen-addled juveniles who see no reason to read?

The problem is not the lack of reading instruction, it is the lack reading PRACTICE contributing to these dismal statistics. Don't look at the Information Scientists to come up with a solution, though. They are too busy dumping the books out of the library's back door to make room for more screens. The time is rapidly approaching when anyone who wants to read an actual book will have to visit the archive to do so.

Taking Out the Trash

Here is an old time memory for many True Archives readers. Once upon a time there existed in our beloved country a practice of taking books that were no longer needed to the library. There the volumes would be evaluated for condition and suitability for inclusion in the library's collection. A very simple concept and by its practice libraries were able to add books at no expense, and even keep duplicates of popular titles. This was a classic win-win siutation, and the chief beneficiaries were the patrons of the establishments.

In today's modern jet-age a-go-go world such practices becoming obsolete. Gone are days when careful selection considerations determined a given book's fate. Now some libraries act like never-ending yardsales, continually holding book sales hosted by their various "Friends" organizations. Due to the growing illiteracy of our society, book donations have grown to the point where the deliveries are burying the staff who administer our present day temples of Information Science. Shelf space amid the tables of computers, maker spaces, coffee bars and other irrelevancies is at a premium, and the continuous recycling of donated books is a necessary evil. It is not all bad, though. A permanent flea market for books helps avoid the other option: the teltale evidence of codex contempt embarassingly visible within the building's trash dumpsters. A third disposal option has been discovered in a recent advertisement found in the official organ of the American Information Science Journal of Bibilioposer Management:

Information Scientists Run Wild!

They’re at it again! The evil cabal of Information Scientists (who will not rest until every library becomes a bookless internet café) have taken over the Vermont State University system! Hardly content with simply shoving the codex aside, nefarious Green Mountain State college administrators have telegraphed their intention to create what they laughingly refer to as “all digital academic libraries.” The VSU vandals of valuable volumes apparently feel that college students are better off perusing pixels rather than print, and they seem determined to bring their vision of codexless campus clatches into fruition. Young people raised on EYEphones and TikTok will feel safe in these new spaces, but here at True Archives we have to ask, “What do you call a library without books?” The answer is obvious: “Anything you want, just don't call it a “library”!

A World Without Books

Here at True Archives we have been warning against the growing stupidity of society as mankind flouders towards a future without the codex. Regular readers of this blog will know that we advocate turning over the traditional library functions to archivists in order to save books, but perhaps we have been overlooking other print saviors; the private collectors. Today's posting honors those bookworms who fill their living quarters with the volumes the librarians are so ruthlessly throwing out!

Stupid, and Proud of it!

Those misguided souls who herald the age of the internet and "smart" phone as a positive development for mankind have missed one obvious truth: if these inventions were supposed to help make humans smarter would we have not seen that result by now? After all, having a toy computer in one’s pocket allegedly gives a person access to the entire sum of human knowledge in just a few touches on the screen. Surely this will lead to universal enlightenment!

Far from it. What we have seen instead is a steady growth of stupidity, perhaps no more obvious with the current supporters of an orange skinned man so incapable of telling the truth that a reasonable person would not trust his directions to find a restroom in a public building. Instead of using their eye-phones to verify the foul utterances of the orange skinned man, his followers use the devices to find even more spurious postings that support his lies. Thus the tools supposedly created to advance human development are the main contributors to its decline.

And what have American libraries done to counter this vile electronic influence? You would think the custodians of the codex would do everything possible to promote print to patrons pursuing potent portions of truth. Alas, such is not the case. The information scientists in charge of our country’s book repositories are destroying their physical collections and advising their customers to consult the screens for answers. Active partners in dumbing down the demographic, biblioposers who claim to love the book while discouraging its use bear a huge portion of the responsibility for the current virus of stupidity among our fellow citizens. Here at True Archives we say to these vandals of our printed heritage, "Turn those books over to the archives if you don't want to dirty your hands with them any longer!"

A Pandemic of Dimwits

The recent presidential election and subsequent accusations of voter fraud has proven one indisputable fact: a shocking number of Americans are complete idiots. Following their orange-faced messiah down the rabbit hole, many voters embrace bizarre conspiracy theories that have no basis in reality. One might cast about for the many reasons of this mass stupidity, but at True Archives we know where to place the blame. Eschewing print, these nattering nabobs of nonsense seem to get all of their information from the internet.

If there truly is a vast conspiracy in our republic, it can be found in the management and operation of academic libraries by Information Scientists who encourage their students to rely on screen pixels for enlightenment. The massacre of books in the millions has left the American college library little more than a pizza parlor staffed by overpaid computer jockeys. Instead of delving deeply into the discourse of distinguished authors, students now take in their information in easily-digestible driblets of dross. It is little wonder that so large a portion of this benighted nation is incapable of thinking beyond a bumper-sticker slogan when they have actively been encouraged to jettison the practice of deep reading for the past two decades.

Someday this pandemic of ignorance will pass, but until that blessed event arrives it is high time the Biblioposers in charge of our academic libraries send their collections to the archives for safe keeping. When we finally emerge from the shadows, we will need the wisdom of the ages more than ever.

The More Things Change . . .

A common refrain from those commenting on the current pandemic pestilence is that society will never really return to “normal.” For example, cautious and prudent citizens will be slow to resume their former patterns of restaurant patronage, if ever. Theaters, concerts, indeed ANY public gatherings will be shunned by many for a long time to come, and the change in the behavior of citizens will be noted and lamented.

However, Information Scientists can rejoice! Following up on their two-decade anti-book marketing strategy, libraries will finally be able to dump the final books from their physical collections because no one will be watching! "We deliver our content digitally," say the proud biblioposers, and the boast is true. To interact with a library is no longer a matter of visiting the place, and likely the vast majority of former patrons will avail themselves of socially-distant visitation via the internet. Meanwhile the codex massacre can quietly continue within the abandoned buildings. As they say, "While the cat's away..."

Should you venture out from your quarantine isolation you might wish to drive by the rubbish dumpster behind your local academic library and take a last look at what used to be their collection.

Why Do You Hate The Book So, My Brother?

If you had asked a librarian why he or she had chosen their profession as recently as thirty years ago, the answer would have certainly involved the respondent’s love of books. After all, why choose a profession dedicated to the custodial care of codex conglomerations if you are only interested in other things?

How times have changed since those innocent days! Now we find librarians replaced by information scientists who spend their time staring into screens, either on their desktops or on their handheld telephones.. The books, once the raison d'être for a librarian, are now considered a physical annoyance that must be removed to continue the transformation of cavernous repository buildings into a curious combination of coffee house, restaurant, lounge, and video arcade. In fact, dealing with the books themselves has been regulated to the lower-paid members of the staff, much like cleaning the restrooms and seasonally shoveling snow from the entryways. The current COVID-19 pandemic will only sharpen the distinction between biblioposers and their maintenance colleagues. Who would want to handle all that virus-contaminated paper if they don’t have to?

Be Careful What You Wish For

As the present pandemic pummels both our health and our economy, an interesting result has been the closure of various “non-essential” businesses and institutions. Included in the expanding list of buildings you can no longer visit are academic libraries. “Not to fear,” claim the Information Scientists who operate these bookless structures, “we can easily deliver our product over the internet.” Indeed they can, and therein is the problem.

People who feel they are getting what they need from a “library” without actually visiting the place are in danger of multiplying at a rate faster than coronavirus victims. Once they reach a critical mass it is only a matter of time before the logical question is asked, “Why are we paying for a vacant building staffed by expensive biblioposers?” If all a university library building is used for is a location for wifi connections and a place for students to order pizza while pretending to study, are there not cheaper options? If college pupils can find what they need to complete assignments by their own internet savvy, why do they need pay the exorbitant salaries of the absent occupants of these deserted physical spaces?

The coronavirus has shown what we can live with, and what we can live without. In truth, we can live without a library building that has no books, and the realization of that fact may be accelerated by the present shutdown.