Soliciting for Obsolescence

Few things are as irritating as the constant solicitation for financial contributions from one’s alma mater. Is it not enough to force students to take on a mountain of debt for a profession that virtually guarantees lifelong penury? These schools actually expect gratitude in the form of a check from graduates who are likely surviving on ramen noodles and a vague hope of someday being able to afford an apartment that is above ground.

But a more insulting form of this systematic supplication comes from those schools whose administrators have changed the very name of the institution. Now calling themselves “Schools of Information Science,” they have the hubris to ask LIBRARIANS to kick in a few shekels to advance their biblioposer agenda. Here at True Archives we graduated from a library school, and if that appellation no longer exists for the place, we believe there is nowhere to send a properly addressed check.

Aside from justifying our tenacious tight-fisted tendencies, the issue of the name change strikes us as more serious than its impact on the college coffers. Since when did “library” become a dirty word to these people? It seems they have become afraid of the title for a once proud and honored profession and are asking the world to forget. We don’t forget, especially when that fund-raising phone call or colorful mailing arrives at True Archives headquarters. And then will I profess unto them, I never knew you: depart from me, ye Information Scientists!